pet peeve

I don't claim to despise, hate, or detest very many things in life, but today I pinned down one of my pet peeves that really gets me: foods that cut up the inside of your mouth.

You know the foods I'm talking about, the stuff that causes your mouth to be lacerated every single time you chew. We have all been there: starving, in a rush, requiring some kind of caloric intake, desperate for something to save us from starvation (or at least to helps us claim that we still believe in eating breakfast). These food provide what we need, but at a stiff price: the cost of safe gums.

Lets face it. These foods are the equivalent to chomping on some razor blades that contain some minimal nutritional value. Let me list off a few that we know aren't good for our mouths but we still con ourselves into eating sometimes:

• Cereals (i.e. Cap'n Crunch, Cheerios, Cookie Crisp, Count Chocula)
  
• Croutons
• Chips
  
• Chips Ahoy Cookies
• Coffee (I've never experienced this one myself, but I do know that hot chocolate isn't too kind on the mouth unit)

Lets hold on for a minute here. For those of you like me who watched Sesame Street for hours as a kid, and was really good at the "One of these things is not like the other" game, take another look at the list we just created.

Am I the only one who gets a little suspicious that all of those foods have the letter "C" at their beginning? There must be some kind of diabolical plot associated with the third letter of the alphabet and things that appear like they are going to make your life better, but really just chew (starts with C!) you up in the end. Here are a few more examples:

• Communism
• Checking accounts
• Chevrolet Cars
• Cocaine and/or Caffeine
  
• Chess
• Chef Boyardee products

Heres my end point: the letter C is out to get us. Which makes me realize another one of my pet peeves: rogue alphabet letters.